First, I was appalled. Then, I was sympathetic. Then, I found the problem.
It all started a few weeks ago when the UnitedHealthcare CEO was shot outside a hotel in Manhattan. Soon, it emerged that this was not a random shooting; it was a targeted attack.
I expected many people to be horrified that a person could be murdered simply because someone had a grievance against his company. But what I didn’t expect was what happened next: so many people all over the internet praised the killer for his act.
“That’s appalling,” I thought. A human life is a human life. You might dislike this company’s policies or aggressive business behavior, and you might be right. But to take the life of a father, a husband, a child of someone else? How can you do that?
Then, in the past weeks, the Los Angeles wild fires began. They spread rapidly, even in areas where multi-millionaires live. So many people lost their homes, and many others had to flee, unsure if their homes would still be there when they returned.
Once again, I see posts online of people who are … celebrating the flames burning celebrities’ homes? I mean, I agree, I don’t think we need to do a GoFundMe campaign for those people. They are doing remarkably well, and I trust their shrewd attorneys to ensure that the insurance companies pay every single penny (plus) of the value of the home.
Still, these are families, kids who are now in shock, childhood memories that are gone forever. It’s appalling to see how many people celebrate it.
On second thought, though, I felt sympathy for all those who feel that society betrayed them. They look with great stress at how the super-wealthy, the successful CEO, and the multi-millionaire celebrities are living a life of ultra-luxury, while they are left behind. And honestly, I am kind of in the same boat as them — also working hard to provide, while looking with jealousy at those who don’t know what struggle really is. So, if we see the uber-rich suffer, isn’t it okay to be a little happy and celebrate?
But after I finished feeling in my heart all kinds of feelings, I started thinking with my brain and analyzing it. And this is when I realized that really, both sides of the story suffer from the same exact problem.
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We are all too self-centered, rich, poor or otherwise
Let me explain.
People are upset with CEOs and celebrities. They feel that those people lost touch with society’s suffering, don’t care anymore about their fellow humans, and only care about themselves.
And because of that, they don’t have to care about them (our fellow humans), don’t flinch when they suffer, and care only about themselves!
Do you see what I see here?
Poor self-centered is exactly the same as rich self-centered — just without money to cover for it. And most importantly, when we see financially or socially successful people who are self-centered, the solution can’t be for us to be self-centered as well. We need to do better.
And this is where purpose comes in. When we are connected with G-d, we always remember that our lives have a greater purpose than just ourselves. A life of purpose is a happy life because we feel connected, we have a reason to wake up in the morning, and we know that we have a unique mission to accomplish in this world.
And when we meet people who are self-centered, we might feel bad for them, and we might even be angry at them, but we will never lose our most important gift ever: our G-d-given humanity.
Rabbi Mendy Kaminker is the Rabbi of Chabad of Hackensack and an editorial member of Chabad.org. He invites you to share your thoughts on this column by emailing rabbi@ChabadHackensack.com
